Is Trying to live up to your potential holding you back?

Is trying to live up to your potential actually holding you back?

This was a recurring theme & question at the event I held this weekend here in San Diego. So many of the women in my life are highly ambitious, intelligent, confident women who- how shall I say this nicely- know what they want & always somehow make it happen.

But it’s a double edged sword ⚔️ at times, because the quest to keep visioning, keeping living up to what’s possible, keep growing, often will come at a cost.

Becoming disconnected from our bodies or our relationships.

Becoming disconnected from our values & what’s really important.

Trying so hard to live up to what we know we can do.... even if- gasp- we don’t even want to.

Some say it’s a generational thing- and in some areas it is- but I beg to differ. I think it’s become a human thing.

While I could write a whole book about this (and have started) it seems we’ve somehow become mildly 😉 obsessed with tying our worthiness to our potential to our success to our happiness to our.... so many things, that somewhere in the mix, our FULFILLMENT has become lost & hidden in the chaos.

I’m not talking the type of fulfillment that checks all the boxes & looks great in your year end review- instead I’m talking the type of fulfillment where you end each day knowing you gave it your all to the things that most matter & feel utterly satisfied in the process.

Then maybe the goal or the vision or the finish line you know you can make happen (it always does) doesn’t even matter, but instead it’s about who you became in the process.

See- you could of course ‘potentially’ be so many things, and so many people are trying to sell you so many ways to get there.

But what I’m more interested in is: 

Do you actually want it, or NEED it?

Are you willing to do what it REALLY takes to get there?

Are you willing to FAIL?

Even more scary, are you willing to SUCCEED?

And ultimately, are you doing this for YOU, or some version of you you think you should be?

You already know the answers. We always do. But admitting them might change things- even if we keep saying we want change 🤷‍♀️

So where has your grasp on potential actually been holding you back? 👑

Jennifer Blackstock
The paradox of the body

This year I’ve been living in the land of paradox using my body as the experimental ground for the contradictory forces that impact ALL areas of life, from money to career to relationships to purpose to.... well everything. By closely examining the dynamic forces occurring within my own body, I’ve been able to approach the rest of life with more confidence, clarity & courageous action than ever before.

i.e. You can still 1000% be in love with your body AND want to transform. 

They are not mutually exclusive & I firmly believe that you are not fully loving your body if you are not giving her adequate exercise & optimizing how she functions- whatever that looks like for YOU.

In fact, if we are in full love & honoring of our body then sometimes the most loving thing to do IS to get fit, lose weight, build strength & more. 

It took me many years to see, but I believe many body-based ‘movements’ actually did more harm than good in the long run by creating a breeding ground for our excuses to reign supreme. 

Don’t worry about your weight! Eat what you want! Love your body as is! But don’t try to change her to fit into what culture says is beautiful! I could go on. On the surface these are great, but they brought with them an underbelly of judgment & inertia, silently making anyone who wanted differently for their own body wrong. 

And created a layer of betrayal dynamics many women are beginning to wake up to {more on this soon}. How can we move on? 🔥Whatever is important to YOU in how your body looks, feels and moves is what is important

End of story🔥

Because if being strong or chasing gains or reducing body fat or racing is what you KNOW you need, you will increase your confidence, feel great & therefore show up even more in the world. 

With this, the more you are aware & paying close attention to the details of your body, the more you can catch yourself if you go too far, push too much or start to make your body more about what others think than about yourself.

It’s a tricky paradox, but one I feel a lot of women are being called to explore right now. Too far in either direction simply hasn’t worked for most of us- so what is your balance?

Jennifer Blackstock