I suspect that the whole point of our spectacularly confounding moment in history is that each of us must become our own savior. And if we hope to accomplish that, relying on our best amateur efforts, we will have to stop waiting around for a supposed professional to do our work for us. We should also shed our addiction to believing in the possibility of any kind of magical intervention.- Rob Brezsny
Many people are talking about this time in history being critical- politically, religiously, astrologically, spiritually, personally, professionally, economically- the world is at the cusp of what may just be something quite extraordinary. And if not, certainly game changing. It's 2012, even the Mayans had it marked as a time of transition- though what type of transition has been much debated.
What I have seen happening over the past year or so, especially the past 6 months, is this greater need to accelerate healing. I have clients coming in from all walks of life, determined to not only heal their physical ailments, but also their deeper spiritual ones as well. From artists to bankers to yogis to therapists, it's an urgent need to dig beneath the surface, identify what needs to be healed, what patterns need to break, what grief and also love for the self needs to be fully realized. To locate where these things are hidden in the body, and allow the body to heal.
Allow the self to heal.
Allow one's self, to do the healing.
Not a doctor, or a shaman, or a guru or a priest. What I am seeing emerge time and time again is not only a willingness of more and more people to heal themselves, but almost a primal need to. More people are not only being called upon to do The Work, but they are suddenly empowered to do so.
I've had this conversation with my meditation teacher, who I respect fully. As I mentioned in my post On Scandals and Alignment, I recently left my kula, or spiritual group, to embark on a time of self-study, self-practice, and growth. This was an immensely hard decision for me, and I spoke with my teacher at length about it before making my decision. There were many factors of course, many of which I've already discussed. But what I wanted to speak about here is a passion that arose inside of me to finally begin listening to my own inner voice and wisdom when it came to my direct healing- and to create the path of practices that worked best for me. You see, ever since I was a little girl in the Catholic church, I struggled with the idea that one priest, teacher or leader had the final say in how I was to live my life and what I was to believe. (I even refused to be Confirmed when I was 13, because it didn't feel right in my heart. Unfortunately, my grandmother thought otherwise and I gave in at the end).
This spark of doubt has lived in me since. Or at least, it always felt like doubt. Now, as I'm watching this new awakening happen, I'm realizing it wasn't doubt at all.
It was Faith, actually.
Faith that I already had the answers inside me. That I already knew what was best for me, what I needed to be happy, what I needed to feel whole.
Whether or not I always listened, well that's a whole other story.
So when I was evaluating my continuing studies, I dove deeply into this question of authority. Of the constructs of faith that have been built, such as churches, priests, rabbis, gurus, teachers. And what I find is this interesting mix-up has occurred. Somehow over time, we as humans have come to believe that our leaders know what is best for us, and for many, the result is to follow them blindly. But also to rely on them, and expect them, to heal us in whatever it is we need- without having to do any of the Work ourselves.
In a way, this is very much Blind Faith. Blind to the realization that the answers are already inside of us. Yes, I'll say it again- the answers to your healing are already inside of you. You already know what you need. You are your own guru. Just as I am mine.
When you come to me for a session, I don't know what your soul needs. I don't know what the deepest longing of your heart is. I don't know how exactly you need to heal it.
What I do know is how to give you the tools to do it yourself- to find your own answers. And this, I believe, is the greatest value of any teacher, guru, priest or professional in your healing path. Empowering you with the tools and knowledge you need to do the healing work yourself. We can be here to guide you & teach you methods to get there, but it must be you who goes to the deepest places of your being to heal. You and only you can Heal yourself.
If someone comes into my practice now and says 'Heal me' (and yes, it often happens just like that), I smile wide and tell them it will not be me who does the healing, but themselves. After the protests that this is impossible, I give them a session of complete stillness, and then politely suggest 30 days of meditation and weekly sessions for a month. You see, because if you don't take the time with yourself to hear your own wisdom, no matter what I do here on the table, the pain will always return. The tears will continue, the illness will not cease. A miracle will not happen. But spending time listening using the tools I or any other healer/ teacher/ guru provide, will give you all that you need to get through what you are experiencing. It may not heal the injury or illness directly, but it will help you be at peace in the midst of it. And that is often what healing, true healing, is all about.
And more and more, I am witnessing this shift. As you begin to wake up and take responsibility for your own lives- no longer relying on others to 'fix' you. No longer living in the dark. No longer denying your own power.
And instead, meeting your one true teacher: YOU