Hello love,

IT’S NOT OFTEN THAT I AM LEFT SPEECHLESS.

In many ways, 2015 has humbled me with the challenges and triumphs, tears and joy, and overall expansion that it has granted me to step into. But what had transpired over the past 3 months has literally left me speechless- blowing my heart wide open, testing all of my excuses and fears, and asking me to step up and become the woman I’ve dreamed of being for so long now... that the vision had almost become like a mirage in the desert- close, visible, clear... but questioning deep down if it could ever be real.

What was separating me from this vision?

MYSELF. AND ONLY MYSELF.

No one else was responsible. Nothing else could get me there but me. No magic pill, formulaic spell, special potion, sacred rock or ancient chant could unlock that door for me to enter this vision.

And what a wild ride it's been to finally realize this Truth.

I’ve sat down to write this email several times over the past 2 months since I last wrote here to you…. but the words have eluded me.

I was still in the lessons.

I had no idea of why I was being called to make the decisions I was making, experiencing the transformations happening, how the deep Knowings were finally rushing in... or why I was being called to stay silent with my beloved tribe for so long.

But I knew deep down that this was the ultimate test of trust and surrender into what Clarissa Pinkola Estes calls

Becoming:

"MEANS TO ESTABLISH TERRITORY, TO FIND ONE’S PACK, TO BE IN ONE’S BODY WITH CERTAINTY AND PRIDE REGARDLESS OF THE BODY’S GIFTS AND LIMITATIONS, TO SPEAK AND ACT IN ONE’S BEHALF, TO BE AWARE, ALERT, TO DRAW ON THE INNATE FEMININE POWERS OF INTUITION AND SENSING, TO COME INTO ONE’S CYCLES, TO FIND WHAT ONE BELONGS TO, TO RISE WITH DIGNITY, TO RETAIN AS MUCH CONSCIOUSNESS AS WE CAN.”- CLARISSA PINKOLA ESTES

The catalyst in this latest process of Becoming {because we always are in the process of deepening further in this act} was what felt like a simple thing- moving into a new home. No big deal- right? We didn’t like our renewal terms on the other place, we found this on chance and fell in love, the approval process was the easiest we’ve ever experienced… all signs clearly pointed towards YES. It was a MAJOR stretch financially but deep down, we KNEW it was the right thing to do.

SO WE LEAPED.

And we waited for the wings to appear…. and waited… and waited….and waited...

Until THUMP

Not only did the wings not appear in the time we expected, things actually got worse and I had to face head-on the actualization of my biggest fear coming to life: the big hairy demon that has haunted my dreams and decisions since- well- as long as I can remember...

It was only AFTER fully facing this fear head-on, and fully surrendering, that the wings finally did come in the most unexpected ways-

Which left me speechless, in awe, and totally humbled by the enormity and beauty of it all.

{Keep reading to learn how I’ll tell the full story in a brand new format}

Reality is though, this process didn’t start this summer- it really began last April: with a skin- cancer diagnosis for my partner Matt. I wrote about it when it first happened HERE.

What has transpired in the 18 months since then has impacted every area of my life, of our lives. The Call to step into my power, the necessity of surrendering to Grace, the pain of going into ‘survival’ mode as life unraveled in many areas and rose up to new heights in others.

My heart completely broke open, I found my courage, and I was tested in Initiations that I never knew I had the strength to handle.

The past 8 weeks have truly been a time of putting ALL of the pieces of me back together in this aftermath, in the safety and security of the first place that feels like my heart home since living on the farm where I grew up.

I've now learned that Home {with a Capital H} truly is where the heart is, and where the heart can heal when she’s been cracked wide open again and again and again.

All that transpired was so perfect in following the thread of the Sacred Myth and living out The Heroine’s Odyssey that I had committed to bringing to life in my work. And with this completion this summer, the Soul of the ‘business’ side of The Heroine’s Odyssey became crystal clear that it was time to let her go, put her out to pasture, and take a long break from the ride of her life.

To press pause on the book writing for an undetermined amount of time.

To close my group program Alchemy Rising at the end of this month.

To say farewell to a path I was certain I needed to walk- and did- but no longer feels like my path {for now}.

And in clearing this space, to fully step into the biggest vision I've had all along- creating epic experiences and programs with an in-person retreat element while creating a solid tribe of change-makers around the world ready to step into their power.

AND LEARNING A REALLY BIG LESSON ABOUT OUR CALLING AND DESTINY IN THE PROCESS.

In this process too though, I’ve been gifted the amazing opportunity to welcome The Unbridled Life back into my life in ways that I never expected, and learn the REAL meaning of Unbridled deep in my bones:

COURAGE. SURRENDER. TRUST. TRUTH. CREATION.

AND VISION.

The Unbridled Life never actually left, she simply was riding beside me as I listened to the whispers and followed the threads of how to bring The Heroine's Odyssey to life. And I see now that I had to bring it to life, because it was through this process that I learned that anything is possible- as long as we have the courage to dream it alive. 

{A deeper level of The Unbridled Life, of course}

It took getting through the biggest Initiation of my life, moving, going off the grid for 2 weeks this summer on retreat and finally settling down in a solid Home to reach this place of understanding and Becoming.

And finally accepting a Truth I had been avoiding: that part of my Calling always has been to be a Storyteller and Vision Keeper- however that is wanting to show up in the present- and being willing to honor that.

The power of holding this flame of Storytelling is simple, yet profound- most of us learn through stories. Stories are an opportunity to see and hear how others have lived, grown, triumphed, and learned so that we too can learn deeper aspects of our own being.

Like watching a movie and feeling like you ARE the hero or hearing the song and feeling like it came from YOUR own heart, the art of Storytelling takes us deep into our souls so we can experience Grace.

After several speaking engagements this summer and leading my first {of many to come!} retreats at Sacred Flame Studios, I saw firsthand the power this ancient art of Storytelling has.

THEREFORE, I AM BEYOND EXCITED TO ANNOUNCE THAT THIS WEEK, MY PODCAST IS FINALLY COMING TO LIFE.

 

My first episode is this Thursday, 10/15 at 1:08PM Pacific Time and can be live streamed HERE:

THE RETURN

In this first episode, I’ll be getting real, raw and honest with you about what happened this year- especially this summer (as we all can learn from it), why it was so important to face our fears, and The Return of The Unbridled Life.

The Unbridled Life Podcast will be live streamed, unscripted, and in total trust that the story that needs to be told is what will come through.

I spent several months feeling into the right platform for me to begin my Podcast: pre-made recordings never felt right, and then I discovered my provider Spreaker which allows for live broadcasting. Why is this so important to me in providing this Podcast for you? Because to fully be a Storyteller, I must be able to feel my listeners in real time.

"Story is far older than the art and science of psychology, and will always be the elder in the equation no matter how much time passes. One of the oldest ways of telling, which intrigues me greatly, is the passionate trance state, wherein the teller 'senses' the audience- be it an audience of one or many- and then enters a state in the world between worlds, where a story is 'attracted' to the trance-teller and told through her. This is the storyteller furthering soul-making" for her listeners~ Clarissa Pinkola Estes

Don’t worry if you can’t make it live though- this episode and all future episodes will air at 1:08PM on Thursdays. They will reside on my Spreaker page and within a few weeks will be available the same day on iTunes, Soundcloud and in our very own App {available soon}- so you can always catch the recordings at a later time.

 

The Unbridled Life Podcast: Unbridled Wisdom for the Modern Embodied Woman has been in the works for most of this year. Blending ancient wisdom, mythology, body energetics, soul whispering and more, I'll lead us on a journey weekly into the core of your heart, depths of your soul, and heights of your wildest visions.

Are you willing to be courageous enough to make your visions reality, even if it means facing your biggest shadows and fears? Are you willing to dive deep and create change in your life? Are you willing to be free?

When we can learn to let go of the reins and trust, true miracles happen in our lives and we go further than we ever thought possible. And then you can be the master of your destiny, of your truth, of your calling- of your Unbridled Life.

I know I’ve been hinting at big things to come, and the time has finally arrived to reveal them. The detour of Integration and Healing over the past few months was unexpected, but created the solid foundation for what is to come.

As I told my participants in Alchemy Rising when I made the decision to close the program, I’m not going anywhere. And if anything, I feel more HERE than I ever have- more committed, more me, more full than perhaps ever in my lifetime. And this means only one thing:

The party is really about to get started. What I have in store for you all- we’re going to have a rocking good time.

I hope you’ll join us around the fire for me to tell my story this Thursday at 1:08PM HERE where we'll open the conversation about what it really takes to walk this path and open our hearts to Grace.

{The Unbridled Life Podcast will broadcast *almost* every Thursday at 1:08PM by visiting HERE. Be sure to refresh your browser right at 1:08PM to be taken to the live stream of the show. There will also be an App in just a few weeks so you can listen directly from the app and chat with me- more on that coming soon!}

In Liberation + Celebration,