What can you do to be strong?

‘What can I do today to be STRONG?’ This is the question that changed it all.

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For years- hell my whole life- this was definitely NOT how I was operating. Instead, I was always asking myself ‘What will make me feel GOOD?’

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Which I believe is a noble question to ask, but for many women misses the mark & leaves room for some toxic patterns to form. I already knew I was strong, so why did I need to add to it? What {I thought} I needed was to feel better than I did. .

But what I realized is that my strong is what I need to foster- NOT push away.

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Of course over the years this looked different. First it was: to feel Good would be excelling at everything I do. Then I’ll feel great because I’ll be winning & everyone will think I’m good enough.

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Then it was ‘Wow, I’m winning so much but I don’t feel good in my mind or body, so I need this food/ this drink/ this party/ this release to lose the tension. THEN I’ll feel good’

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Then none of those things were satisfying to me anymore, so I turned my attention outward- ‘Well if I can see how everyone ELSE is not living in good, then I therefore must be good... so then I can feel great’ {ahem- any of these sound familiar?}.

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But they got EXHAUSTING and I often felt worse instead of better. Thus starting the cycle again 🤔

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See- all my life I had solid evidence that I was strong- in fact the most common compliment I receive is exactly that. But when we ARE something, the tendency can be to ignore it, or worse- subconsciously do everything we can to prove it.

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So in always asking myself what I needed to feel GOOD, I was inevitably creating situations where I HAD TO BE STRONG- dramas, adventures, health crisis, needing to prove my worth & sticky situations to get out of- oh my!

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All because instead of fostering my strong, owning my ambition & simply allowing myself to be fierce, I was always trying to just feel good- in all the ways I thought a woman ‘should’ feel good. But.... it never worked.

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When all I needed to do was ask myself everyday

‘What do I need today to feel Strong’ & let that guide my choices.

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What if you tried this question on today? What new choices might you make? 🔥

Jennifer Blackstock