How to Rise Like a Phoenix {Part 2}

I am loving all of your emails that I received after last week’s Part 1 of How to Rise Like a Phoenix. The emails, the poetry, the heart-opening has brought tears to my eyes and I’m still deep in responding to many of you.

Thank you for being so vulnerable.

This week, I share Part 2 of How to Rise Like a Phoenix. Stepping in the fire and feeling the heat of transmutation is always- always– required in the process of alchemy. And what I have found in all these years- the more I embrace who I am and whatever stage of life I am embodying, the easier and quicker the process- even when it feels really hard.

So for Part 2, I share with you my inspiration for this piece and invite you into two more steps to allow this energy to lift you up, instead of burn you down.

Back in July, I made the decision to move to San Diego without ever having BEEN here. I just knew– deep down- that I was meant to live in the area and the messages got so intense it was time to act. We planned the trip, drove down, and within moments of arriving, knew this was home. You can read more about that adventure in The Missing Piece of Manifestation.

What I didn’t know at the time was that a few months prior to moving here, there had been a huge fire in the area that destroyed many homes, including one building in our complex. We had seen the effects driving around on our first visit, but we had NO idea that the fire had come so close to home- literally. Like, in our backyard and affecting a few of the units in our building close to home…

When we moved in, some pretty intense spiritual experiences began to happen. A friend had a spiritual awakening while visiting, and then another did as well. Both Matt and I started to shed old patterns and beliefs, said goodbye to friendships and toxic situations we didn’t even realize were toxic. I started having intense dreams of fire and The Phoenix on a nightly basis, and mystical experiences in my meditations. I began to stand up for myself more, and speak my truth where before I had been terrified to.

It could be said that I riled a few feathers in the process, cried quite a few ugly tears, had a lot of difficult conversations. I felt myself get lighter as I accessed more and more of my truth and here’s the key- began to act on it.

While scary and disorienting at times, it also felt seamless. Right. And really fucking good. Energizing. A whole new level of freedom by casting off the reins and experiencing new levels of unbridled freedom. Standing in the fire, but at the same time experiencing beautiful growth & unfolding into inspiration I didn’t even know existed.

And one morning, after a particularly fiery meditation, I wandered behind our apartment building expecting to have a gorgeous view of the canyons behind us. But what I found instead was this:

Charred, burnt ground from the fires a few months before. And beside it, a lush, green, overflowing field of flowers and pumpkins, birds and owls and magic.

ALCHEMY IN REAL TIME. 

THE GOLD THAT COMES FROM THE FIRES OF TRANSMUTATION.

THE PHOENIX- RISING FROM THE FLAMES OF HER OWN WILLINGNESS TO KEEP GOING, KEEP RISING, BEING REBORN OVER AND OVER AGAIN EVEN AFTER THE HARSHEST OF FIRES. 

And I decided in that moment that my new system- The Heroine’s Odyssey and all that’s to come with it {hint, get ready for some Alchemy Rising coming soon}- was ready to be born. And in making this move that my soul led me to, I had cleared away all those things standing between me and the next steps of my destiny. 

So never give up when the fires of transmutation are burning- you never know what could be ready to grow on the other side of the flames.

So today I want to offer you two more steps in How to Rise Like A Phoenix…

STEP 6: CELEBRATE. CELEBRATE. CELEBRATE.

This right here I could talk about all day long. With a glass of champagne in my hand sitting on a beach and reveling in all life has to offer. Because you see, I believe that Celebration is the key to healing. To me, celebration is an up-leveling of gratitude and integral in living fully.

In early 2013, I was in a dark place. Matt and I had broken up for a few months, my hands and back were swollen and in pain daily from all the bodywork I was doing, and I was exhausted in late stages of adrenal fatigue.

I was on the brink of my old friend Depression. I felt like I was living in the fire without seeing the light- a desolate charred wasteland with only a few greens to remind me of life beyond burn-out. Just like the canyon behind my home:

And then one day, a friend recommended that I go out to celebrate life, even if I really didn’t want to. The last thing I wanted to do was celebrate. I didn’t want to spend any money, I felt exhausted and ugly, and couldn’t think of one thing I was happy about.

But I gathered up my courage and took myself out to dinner anyway.

And what I realized, as I ate my favorite pizza and sipped a glass of bubbly, was that somewhere, I got stuck in the land of should’s. Instead of living life according to my own path and my own desires, I was living what I was supposed to be doing. Someone once told me I would be a good bodyworker, so I got certified. Another told me I would be great at CranioSacral Therapy, so I started to do that. Clients loved me so I continued. Money came in so I felt safe. That expert said it would be cheaper to work from home…. you see what I’m saying. While I loved what I did, I knew deep down it wasn’t my destiny, that there was more I was here to offer the world, and so I was stuck.

So what did I do to get unstuck? I started celebrating. Every damn day. No matter what. I developed weekly and daily Celebration Rituals. I called friends to celebrate with me. I started talking about it more. I named at least three things I wanted to celebrate daily- the good, the bad and the really ugly. It all mattered. It all was important. And it all needed to be celebrated.

And you know what happened. As I celebrated it all, no matter what, the ugly began to fall away. The bad became not so bad. And the good began to multiply exponentially.

So no matter what is happening in your life, have the courage to celebrate and honor that it’s all perfect, all part of the path, and everything has been necessary for the adventure. And send me pictures of you celebrating so I can celebrate with you!

STEP 7: SAY NO WHEN YOU KNOW

I’ll raise my hand and admit two things:

1. I’m a Recovering People-Pleaser and

2. I often suffer from FOMO- The Fear of Missing Out

Combine the two and it’s a recipe for over-commitment, distractions and exhaustion. Over the years, I’ve helped many of you overcome these as well and realize the awesome power of the word NO.

But it’s not always easy. Sometimes when you hear the No, you might already be committed. Or it might mean a difficult conversation. Or many. Or it just plain might not make any logical sense.

I have a lot more to say on this topic and will be writing about it in the coming weeks, but for today as we harness the energy of Samhain and the natural cycle of completion and metaphorical death in service of being reborn, an exercise:

If you are feeling like something is coming to completion in your life, really sit in the discomfort and listen to what your heart and inner knowing are telling you. It might not make sense. You might have no idea why. It might just be fear of the unknown and you are meant to stay. Or not.

Reality is, we never know what is on the other side of any decision we make.

WHEN WE LISTEN TO OUR INNER GUIDANCE AND TRUST THAT SHE’S SPEAKING UP FOR A REASON, WE CAN’T GO ‘WRONG’. {CLICK TO TWEET} 

I have a lot more to say on the dynamic of Yes and No and we’ll play more with it soon (along with some big announcements), but in the meantime I would love to continue this conversation below or if you are more comfortable, email me privately if you have anything to share.